I Hate Hat Tournaments

I don't think it makes me a bad person, but when I play Ultimate I play to win. I understand the point of a hat tournament or a draft style league is about getting everyone involved and make sure everyone plays roughly an equal amount. I know it's okay to try and win and it's not like people don't care about winning or losing in these competitive situations, but its secondary. It's probably a character flaw, but it's just important that I've recognized it and don't put myself in those situations. Last night I went out to play in this indoor league they have here. You can just show up to play as a sub. My wife is playing in the league and so I tagged along with her. I end up on her team, which was cool since we've not played together in 5 years due to having kids. There is a mix of players, but most are young with only a few people that can handle the disc. In the 2nd game we're winning 9-6 with ten minutes to go. The wheels come off and nobody can catch or throw. This is the type of setting that keeps me away from this type of competition. I want to figure out the best way to win the game. That is going to mean not playing people and calling some plays that invole the 3 people that can handle to make sure you score. People don't play in this type of league to come and stand on the sidelines though, so that's just not an option. So, of course we lose and I'm annoyed and thinking I shouldn't have even come out. I've played in leauges where I put the team together and that's a different story. I've assembled the team and have confidence in all the players on the team, even Corey and belive me that guy can be turnover machine in league play. I find myself feeling guilty about being this way. Ideally I could just go out and enjoy playing in a hat tournament and have fun with it. It's just not that fun for me.